Saturday, July 21, 2012

Yesterday, I began a two-part blog about what constitutes true beauty.  How everyone has hang-ups about their appearance.  How the media drives the frenzy to look beautiful—the media’s version of what true beauty is.  In addition, I tapped on how people’s self-images are often led by comments made by others.

As a result, we have perfectly healthy individuals literally starving themselves to death, suffering from other self-inflicted eating disorders and also allowing doctors to carve them up in order to obtain the unobtainable—a perfect body. 

But beauty doesn’t originate on the outside.  Instead, just as my girlfriend realized once rid of her abusive husband, it begins with a series of single thoughts that bubble up from deep within a person.  Some of those are self-led.  Others are the result of compliments received that boost a person’s moral and self-image.  Still more are a fusion of the two.

I wish with all my might that the media would cease the assault, as I view it, on how people should look.  What ideal beauty is.  Is an actress who’s spent thousands of dollars on clothing, hair, makeup, plastic surgery etc, not to mention all the photo editing that’s done to enhance her looks, any less lovely than a “simple” peasant out on the plains?  Or a native of Africa, gliding through life au-natural?  Is a burn victim unable to be beautiful simply because of some terrible tragedy?  I say, no. 

I believe on many occasions those who the media doesn’t focus on are the most stunning individuals.  They’re the ones who make me pause and take a second glance.  Why?  Simple.  If you take your time looking at people one thing becomes abundantly clear.  Beauty, real unadulterated beauty, radiates from within a person.  From there, it has to find a way out.  And it does. 

Next time you’re in a crowded area, take a few moments to view those around you.  Which ones have an extra bounce to their step?  An energy that’s not explained but draws in the onlooker?  Who that you view stands out from the crowd?  And why? 

I believe beauty transcends more than what a camera can capture.  Yes, looks can be appealing.  But beauty that effervesces from deep within a person, bubbling up like the magical bubbles in a champagne flute, that’s the beauty that calls to me.  It’s a mentality the individual has, a positive vibe, an energetic bounce to them that makes me view them as beautiful.  Looks, their physical appearance, that’s secondary.  To me, how a person acts, treats others, views life and whether they have a positive or negative energy, those are my markers for measuring beauty.  I wish the media would share and highlight that view. 

Friday, July 20, 2012

Body image.  Everyone has one or more hang ups about their body.  Doesn’t seem to matter if they’re a 10 plus on the rating scale.  Even those individuals have insecurities about how they look.  How sad.

I was talking with a girlfriend last night who’s five foot tall.  She has no hang ups about her height, but, after having her children, her husband had the audacity to tell her she was no longer pretty.  That her stretch marks, the very marks created on her body by their children growing inside her, made her unattractive.

WTH?! 

Thankfully, she saw the light and the marriage ended after he cheated on her.  There’s another happy ending to this story.  My girlfriend’s been taking Rumba classes and is thrilled with how much body sculpting is happening while she’s having fun.  She shared with me how she went to an event with a bunch of other women the other day, women she’s always thought were prettier and in better shape than her.  While looking around, my girlfriend smiled as she scanned the ladies and noticed that she was equally pretty and in better shape than many.

So what happened?  Did my girlfriend magically transform into a beautiful swan overnight?  No.  Basically, she got rid of her husband—an individual who daily poisoned her mind and derailed her self-confidence by being mean to her.  When a person, any person, is forced to live in negative surroundings, sooner or later, that negativity seeps into the fibers of their mentality, making them think less of themselves, as was the case with my girlfriend.  Get rid of the negative influence, surround yourself with positive, respectful people and you’re self-image is bound to soar to new heights.

Does this mean a person won’t still have body image insecurities?  No.  Unfortunately, the media taints our perception of what beauty—true beauty—is as they drive home the message that unless a person is beyond flawless then they aren’t beautiful. 

Tune in tomorrow to read more about what constitutes true beauty.