Monday, February 21, 2011

About a year back, I wrote about “me dates,” a concept first introduced to me by Julia Cameron in her book, The Artist’s Way. The pretense of a me date is for an individual to value themselves enough to set aside time to do something just for them. It can be as simple as getting a mug of coffee, going for a hike, strolling the mall, walking the beach or whatever floats your boat. But the main guideline is that a me date is to be spent by the individual—alone and not in conjunction with getting any actual tasks checked off their to-do list.

Today, I took one of those. Not just for a little bit, but for a good portion of the day. I needed some time to just be alone, refocus and treat myself to things that made my soul sing. So that I did!

Seeing as it was a spectacular day, I went for a run up in the mountains—one of my passions. Immediately following that, I headed to a Pilates class where I swore the instructor must have been onto the fact that I was sore from my run and tried her darnedest to do me in with the strenuous workout she had the class do. Following that, I called my best friend and we took the time to catch up with one another, sharing bits and pieces of our lives, gaining strength from the other and comparing notes on how we’re feeling.

And how do I feel now? Refreshed, revitalized and like I’m back on track. It’s a great place to be, and had it not been for my taking a me date, I’m not sure I’d be in this very special place. So I’m grateful that I could treat myself and will try to remember to do so more often.

Sunday, February 20, 2011

A couple of days back, I mentioned a four-part article that had been written about me, following a lengthy interview by a local journalist who was spotlighting my writing career and me. Part one had already been released and can be found here:

www.examiner.com/writing-in-riverside/author-spotlight-cindy-hanna-part-i-of-iv

And just this past Friday, part two of the article came out. It can be found here:

www.examiner.com/writing-in-riverside/author-spotlight-cindy-hanna-part-ii-of-iv

I hope everyone takes the time to read the articles.

Saturday, February 20, 2011

Some days are just meant to be laughed through. Today is proving one of those. Waking up, I was thrilled to see that it wasn’t raining as had been predicted. Checking the weather site I have programmed into my computer, I realized that I had three hours until the storm was due to arrive—plenty of time to get in my mountain run. So, I layered myself in cold weather clothing, complete with gloves and headed out.

Though the air was thick with moisture, the sky was clear. But…about two miles up, I felt the first raindrop, followed not long after by a few more. Then the drops changed and felt suddenly heavy. I realized that as I’d climbed in elevation, the temperature had dropped at least twenty degrees and what was now hitting me was ice.

Here I had a choice, turn back or keep going. Despite it being cold out, I was warm in my clothing and decided to keep going. Continuing on another half mile, the ice began driving into me, pinging off my face, already sensitive from the cold. Though they kept fogging up, I had to keep my sunglasses on to block the ice pellets from hitting my eyes.

Continuing to climb in elevation, I was met with more driving ice and then snowflakes. I finally crested the summit and headed back down. Leaving behind the snow, I again came across the driving ice crystals that stung my face followed by a consistent rain. I settled into my run, enjoying the elements. Through out, I had to watch my footing, as the path I was on was steep and mostly clay, which feels like running on a combination of dog messes and slick ice when wet.

Ew!

When I got home, the first thing I did was head to the coffee maker to grab a hot mug, prior to heading to the shower. But I never made it that far. Rounding the corner into the kitchen, something on the floor below the coffee maker caught my attention—lots of water and mounds of soap bubbles!

What the…?

For a second, I paused, completely dumbfounded as to what had happened. But then I recalled just prior to heading out, that I had asked our youngest son to put soap in the dishwasher and turn it on. It was then that I began laughing—hard—realizing what had happened. Unable to locate the regular bottle of liquid dishwasher detergent, which has since been replaced with little cakes that we put in the dispenser, he grabbed the bottle of liquid hand dishwashing soap and filled the reservoir. Satisfied that would clean the dishes—after all, it was for dishes—he turned on the dishwasher and left the room—enter me just at the end of the cycle.

About ten minutes later, we had most of the soap bubbles from within the machine removed and all the ones and water off the floor. Now, the machine is finishing another wash—without any detergent this time—in the hopes that will complete cleaning the mess.

Like I said, some days are just meant to be laughed through, and that’s exactly what my son and I have done.

Friday, February 19, 2011

By now, those who follow my blog are aware there are a wide variety of thoughts pinging their way around my head any given day, and I’m no shy to share them here. So why should today be any different. Right?

We read it in the papers, hear it on the news, view articles about it in magazines and listen to folks discuss the topic—should parents be held accountable for the wrongdoings their children commit. There have been laws posed that would send the parents of truant kids to jail. Also, laws have be proposed that would send the parents of kids who commit crimes to jail instead of the child themselves. Additionally, lawmakers have tried to make it the financial responsibility of parents when their kids do something wrong. And then there’s the whole part of the local community turning their back on the parents at a time when they most likely need understanding and support.

So these are my questions. If a parent is doing everything in their power to keep their child under control, have made use of all resources available to them, and still the child acts up, should the parent be held accountable for what their children do? At what point does it become the responsibility of the child themselves to be made to pay for their culpability? What if the child appears to be doing the right thing, going through all the motions of having things under control only to suddenly surprise everyone by committing a random act against the law? Who’s to blame then? The child? The parent? School officials who didn’t notice the warning signs if there were any?

In theory, it sounds all fine and dandy to hold a parent accountable for the acts their child commits—but only in theory. When one looks on a deeper level at what drives the child or if, in fact, there is nothing the parent can do to control them, then one must take a step back and realize that perhaps it’s time for the child themselves to step up and be made to pay financially or otherwise for their own offenses.

In addition, if the parent is held accountable, is one or both put behind bars. If the answer is both, then what happens to the other kids that might be in the family? Why must they be made to suffer for the crimes of their wayward sibling?

Parenting is hard—the most challenging job one can ever enter into. Some take it seriously and yet, despite everything they do, one or more of their kids ends up getting in serous trouble with the law. Other parents exert the bare minimum effort and some are lucky enough to have kids that toe the line, doing what is expected and in keeping with the laws. In my opinion, to universally hold a parent responsible for their wayward child is not only irresponsible but can be damaging to others involved: other siblings, the parents themselves, community members.

There’s no easy answer and nor should there be a universal code to which all must be held accountable. In my humble opinion, I think each case is as individual as the people involved. Let’s not forget that these cases do involve people—real human beings with foibles just the same as you and me who don’t need to be shunned for their shortcomings. Instead, they could benefit from a little empathy.