What is commitment? Following are the things that I believe constitute a commitment. They may be to you liking or not. Either way, they are what have worked for me. Perhaps we share some of the same views.
To me, commitment translates to trust. Loyalty. Respect. Allowing another the freedom needed to grow and evolve on their own. Trusting that the person will bring back to the relationship that newly gained self-knowledge. Knowing that what’s brought back will strengthen the relationship tenfold…maybe more.
It’s at this point that devotion sets in—or should. There needs to be a mutual understanding to shore the other up. To provide them shelter when they feel inept. To praise their efforts even though they may fall short. To willingly jump in to help them make up the difference in achieving what they set out to do.
And finally, infatuation is an integral part of the commitment equation, for it allows one partner to see past the shortcomings of another, instead, focusing on what makes them shine brighter than the rest. It’s the ability to let fall away the little things that otherwise might drive us crazy and undermine the relationship.
Commitment means to recognize what you want. Need. Dig in. Have a fighting spirit, if needed, to achieve that desire.
Twenty-eight years ago, I did that. I met a man whom I instantly recognized to be my kindred spirit. The ying to my yang. The person who made me whole. Two weeks later, I told a close friend that was the man I would marry and share my life with. So far, it’s worked out that way. Today, my husband and I celebrated our twenty-sixth wedding anniversary, and although it’s hard to believe, I’m more in love with him now that when I first knew I’d marry him.
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