There’s something I find myself wondering about on a fairly regular basis. Not sure if others also consider it, so I thought I throw it out there.
I run a mountain trail, daily, that’s right by our house. And although this particular trail isn’t ultra remote or anything, being traversed by a high volume of people and their pets, there are regular wild animal sightings. After all, the trail is off the beaten path where nature has free reign.
As this trail is a challenging one, most who frequent it do so with the intent of actually working out, knowing that they will build up a sweat in the process. As such, people don’t aim to dress to impress, although, I have seen some rather odd choices of clothing for navigating a tough mountain trail, not the least of which are high heels. Yes, actual stiletto high heels. But I digress….
I chalk the heels and odd outfits, not quite in keeping with working out, to people not knowing any better, hoping that the next time round, their choices will be more suiting to their purpose. But what I don’t get are the women who, aware that they are in and amongst nature, douse themselves with what often seems like an entire bottle of perfume before heading to the mountain.
I’m sure you know of the ones I’m speaking of. You can smell these women at least a quarter of a mile away. I encountered one such woman the other day. Up ahead of me by about a quarter mile, the air was beyond thick with her perfume—downright choked out by it. Though she was going at a good clip, I was a bit faster. Hoping and praying that I’d pass her before growing too lightheaded from her perfume overdose, I quickened my pace. Of course, doing so made me breather harder. Sucking in her perfume trail, the fragrance burned down my throat and made me cough.
By the time I was about a hundred yards behind and downwind of her, a gentle breeze had me nearly asphyxiate by her perfume overdose, and my eyes began to water. So, not only was I attempting to run uphill, something I’m not very fond of, but also I was sucking in so much perfume that I wondered at what point it might prove unhealthy for my lungs. And then, when my eyes began to water, my focus hazed a bit, making it a challenge to not trip over rocks or to see rattlesnakes had there been any.
Despite my dilemma, I knew that if I just hung in there and quickened my pace a bit more, I could soon end my misery. So, that’s what I did through an odd combination of holding my breath and trying, only when absolutely necessary, to only breathe in through my mouth so as to minimize the affect of her perfume on me. Just as I pulled even with the woman, I had to take a breath of air. Not that I wanted to, mind you. But I had to, as I was working hard to pass her in the least amount of time possible. The second I took my breath, I cursed being a critter that needed oxygen and seriously questioned if there was any oxygen left in what I had breathed in, sure that the off-cast fumes from her perfume overdose might well have sucked it all out of the air.
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