Monday, January 9, 2012

Viewing comments readers made to my accounting of what I endured during my surgery last Wednesday gave me pause.  People wrote that they were grossed out, horrified and had stopped reading the words I wrote.  It was also expressed that I was very brave. 

Hmmm….

Those who know me are aware that what they see is what they get.  I approach life with the same philosophies and mindsets I blog about.  If I’m faced with something negative or challenging, I seek to find the positive.  I am also honest.  As a writer, I incorporate these characteristics into what I scribe. 

What I endured during my surgery last Wednesday was unusual.  Well…unusual in that most who undergo surgery don’t feel all I did, their body’s ability to accept local anesthesia blocking those sensations.  Additionally, most would opt to undergo the procedure I did after having been given drugs to alter their state of mind, thus rendering them “loopy.”  As I mentioned in the first blog of my surgery narration, I forewent those drugs due to how they’d affected my ability to write after my last surgery—a common problem with artists called “bubble on the brain.”

I’m a person who prides herself on being true to myself.  In addition, as a creative person, I’m often inspired to write about things I believe others might benefit from.  True, the description of my surgery was tough to take.  It’s a behind-the-scenes view of something many have endured, though their minds and bodies, paralyzed by anesthesia, are unable to recount after the anesthesiologist asked them to count backwards from 100.

Those who read my narrative might think I went to some quack.  Nothing could be further from the truth!  My surgeon is one of the top few in the country for his specialty.  He is empathetic, personable and quite concerned about the comfort and well being of his patients, doing all he can to mitigate their discomfort. 

Aware that Novocain doesn’t always work for me and also that I had trouble with “bubble on the brain” after using anesthesia last surgery, he was ultra mindful of walking me through each and every stage of the surgery, checking in continuously to see if he should continue or if I needed him to stop.

Yes, mine was an unusual surgery where surgeon and patient needed to work more as a team to get the job done than would normally be the case.  I don’t view what I went through as my being brave, just as a necessary part of my surgical process, one I’m thrilled to have gone through with my capable surgeon and his assistant.  I’m pleased with the results, am bouncing back quicker than I did following my surgery a year ago and will now put this subject to rest.