Monday, August 16, 2010

There are times when one has to take a step back and assess a relationship. Is there hope for it? Can it be mended? If so, what benefit might you gain from it?

I’ve spent the past four days reconnecting with family in South Carolina, many of which I haven’t seen in quite some time. Others I’ve never met. And, like with most families, there were strained situations with individuals.

I believe in maintaining relationships, especially long-term ones. But there comes a point when it’s prudent to analyze if it’s healthy to continue trying to mend a broken relationship. Recognize if both parties are interested in reconciliation. If not, then no matter how hard you try, or how much you give of yourself, reconciliation is not possible.

Of course, this doesn’t mean that a happy medium can’t be achieved. In fact, I’m a firm believer in having folks get along with one another, only if that’s on the surface, so as to eliminate awkwardness when inevitable meetings occur.

So, I entered this weekend hoping for the best, but realizing that reconciliation would most likely not occur. I’m willing, but the other person is not. The weekend began with a heavy silence lying between us like a brick wall. But halfway through, the other person offered a surface civility that helped to ease the tension. And for that I’m grateful. Up until that point, my efforts had gone ignored, even when I tried to greet them.

Although it’s not the happy ending I’d hoped for, I realize that progress was made, which gives me hope for the future. And in the end, that’s all we can do—hope.