Welcome to my World! I love to absorb my surroundings and people watch. I am fascinated by and embrace all walks of individuals. We all vary in our idiosyncratic ways yet are ultimately the same, striving to forge our way through this journey we call life, in the hopes that we might each self-actualize along the way.
Allow me to introduce myself. I am a writer, competitive long-distance runner, mother of four. I love challenging myself in all endeavors I engage in. I write novels. I run 100-120 miles per month and participate in races, half-marathons, full marathons and obstacle courses across the United States. have four children: a 25-year-old son, a 23-year-old daughter, a 21-year-old daughter and a 16-year-old son who is in high school.
I love to explore my surroundings and can often be found venturing out on lengthy treks of up to twenty-nine miles to traverse: mountains, streams, waterfalls, deserts, canyons, beaches and anywhere else that I can connect with nature to feel her pulse and be fed by her wisdom. Even the streets of the metropolis cities hold wonder for me, with their unique flow and energy.
I hope that you enjoy browsing through my web site for a glimpse into my world of never-ending adventures, perils and awakenings.
Cindy
There are those who believe that one should only set their aim at the level they are sure they can achieve. I disagree. I like to push myself and be pushed by others to rise to higher levels than I thought possible.
This isn’t to imply that one should set unrealistic expectations, only that they should be willing to strive to go further than expected. If we don’t set our aim high, then we will never rise to higher levels.
I don’t find anything wrong with wanting to improve upon one’s self. That’s what I believe happens when a person sets their aim high and endures to reach those set goals. The journey towards achieving ones goals is what, I believe, builds inner strength, character and forges one’s resolve. All are admirable gains, so I’m going to continue setting my goals super high.
I like taking a step back and letting things play out. True, there are things that have to get done, schedules that must be adhered to. But beyond that, sometimes, it’s nice to distance myself slightly so I’m able to gain a better perspective of all the possibilities.
Right now, I’m doing that. My father’s services will be this weekend—a weekend that was already full of activities due to the holiday. It’s only fitting that my father will be laid to rest this holiday weekend, as he served our country back when.
I know that when I gaze up at the fireworks this Forth of July, no matter where I am, they’ll have a little deeper meaning. I imagine it will somewhat seem like with each explosion, my father’s spirit will be taking flight, illuminating a path for each of us to consider.
Long ago, I heard that for every life that departs, another emerges. I recall sitting in the front row of my husband’s grandfather’s graveside service twenty-two years ago, going into labor with our oldest daughter. With all my might, I hoped and prayed that this saying wasn’t true, for I sooooo didn’t think that having my child at the graveside was the time or place.
Today, I was reminded of that saying.
Just outside one of our sliding glass doors, we have a potted ficus tree that mama humming birds love to make their nests in each year. This year was no exception. My kids and I have had the greatest fun watching the progress of the nest building, laying of eggs, roosting of the mama, eggs cracking open and two perfect little humming birds emerging and growing stronger by the day.
Today, I asked my daughter to go and point to the baby birds from the outside so I could get our granddaughter to look directly at them. When my daughter went out and snapped a coupe of photos, one of the baby birds, not yet a flyer, jumped out of the nest!
Oh, no!
There was an eternity that seemed to span as we watched its wobbly flight pattern, hoping with all our might that it would sail off into the blue sky or back into the nest instead of landing on the concrete below.
As we held our breath, the baby bird flapped its wings with as much gusto as it could muster and eventually managed to fly off without crash-landing.
Thank goodness!
Standing inside, I held my granddaughter tight, her delighting in the show. My mind turned to a phone call I’d received earlier in the morning, informing me that my father had passed away after a two-week struggle. Once again, I thought of that day, twenty-two years ago when I went into labor at the graveside. But this time, I didn’t fight the notion that for every life that parts, another begins.
Watching the baby hummingbird struggle to gain its balance in the air, I cheered it on, pleased that such a gentle creature was emerging into a new life just as my father’s had come to a close.
I frequently blog about friends. Why? Because, I believe having them in my life makes it much richer than it would be without them. I also blog about how we help one another by supporting the other when needed.
Mine have been doing that for me lately, really rising to the occasion last night. Though we don’t keep tabs on who helps whom, how often or by what means, we do keep our eyes open for opportunities to repay acts of kindness that have been directed towards us. Usually, there’s a little lag time between when a friend super supports us and when we can return the favor.
Last night, I went to support some of my friends who were doing a stage performance. They’re skilled, and I knew they’d do fine, but I felt the overwhelming need to be there for them. Their show began, and I immediately noticed that both were nervous and that as a result, they weren’t quite hitting their marks. My heart went out to them, and I tried to send good energy vibes towards them.
At the intermission, they came over to greet and thank me for coming to watch them. I told them I wouldn’t have missed it. Then we spoke about the technical aspects of their show and how each was a bit off their timing and marks. The more we talked, the more relaxed my friends became. By the time they went back on stage, they were their normal confident selves and were able to make it through the rest of their performance without a hitch.
Did something I say help them? Was my presence enough to smooth their nerves? Did their regained confidence have nothing to do with me being there to support them? I won’t know for sure until I get a chance to talk with them later tonight. But one thing I do know. If I had been up there with my nerves hindering my performance, I would have been beyond grateful to see a friend sitting in the audience, there to support me, cheer me on and help calm me during the intermission. After all, that’s what friends do—they follow their heart to support one another in any way they can.
I’ve always been fascinated by what a difference a single day and sometimes even a number of hours can make in how a person feelings. For example, something can happen that turns their world upside-down, them plummeting down a slippery slope of feeling unhappy as a result. And there they remain, careening down that slope, unable to stop from sliding farther. The more they slide, the deeper their despair. Before long, although intuitively, they know things will get better—eventually—they can’t see a near end to their dismay. And then whammo, out of nowhere something else happens that again shifts their world, this time righting it in the process.
That something can be an event, something the person witnesses, or something someone says to them or that they inadvertently overhear. However the shift-causing event occurs, it has an impact on the person, one that manages to spin them around, right them on their feet and send them back into the world once again feeling large and in charge of not only themselves but also of their emotions.
I love it when this happens. How things can seem completely out of control one minute and then totally under control the next. It’s happened to me countless times, each event leaving me wondering at how amazing the transformation is. And, just like everyone else, there are times when I can’t see hope of a solution much less a quick one. But…if I am patient, one always seems to happen my way. And that is what I find most fascinating.
There are times when we need a gentle, and sometimes, not so gentle push from friends and loved ones. Whenever someone does this for me, I don’t get annoyed. Rather, I count my blessing that I have a host of such amazing supportive friends and loved ones who care enough to give me a boost when needed.
Sometimes, we’re too close to a situation to see a clear work around. That’s where those who care about us come in handy. They can usually maintain more objectivity in those situations, which allows them to not only see what needs to be done, but to also have a willingness to kick us in the rear if needed.
My friends did that for me today. Beginning this morning, a number of them, aware that I’ve been going through a difficult situation, reached out and convinced me that joining them at a class tonight would not only do my heart good, but would also help to engage my mind. Both, they knew, would ultimately make me feel better. And you know what? They were right.
At first, with me being distraught, I had been resistant to the idea, thinking it would only further complicate matters. But my friends saw things as they really were. So when I tried to resist and politely decline their offers, they didn’t push or get upset. Instead, they gave me some space, but were sure to not leave me alone to draw within myself, as I’m prone to do when hurting.
I’m glad I followed the gentle promptings from my caring friends. That I trusted in them enough to know that they had my best interest at heart. That they would be there for me if needed. For in the end, they knew what was best for me, and I feel transformed as a result of following their lead.
Earlier today, family members and I were marveling over how many folks fail to do their jobs. Well, I suppose in one respect, they do their jobs…but not to completion. Many half do the work they’re intended to do.
I’m not sure when this became acceptable behavior. I’ve noticed it more and more in recent years. Can’t tell if I’m just more in tuned or if it’s happening with more frequency. It seems to matter not if skilled or unskilled individuals do avoid the work. They’re highly paid or minimum wage. There seems to be no set criteria for slackers…only that they exist and are becoming more noticeable.
Perhaps you’ve been somewhere and noticed this as well. It happens in all forms. Could be a worker who’s perturbed that you’re expecting them, heavens forbid, to do their job. Or how, when an employee falls short of completing a task and you bring it to their attention, they get upset, as if you should be happy with what they did do. Or what about the person who doesn’t bother to check the specifics of their job, putting others at risk?
All of these are behaviors I see with more frequency. And I find that disturbing. Being a person who prides herself on working hard, getting the job done and completing said job in as efficient a manner as possible, I can’t wrap my peanut brain around the mentality that it’s okay to slack, especially if others are counting on me. Yet, there are those who seem more than comfortable with that mentality—slacking.
Personally, I don’t get it. And I’m proud to say that I don’t. I’m going to keep doing things my way, where I work hard to complete my tasks to their fullest so I can take pride in a job well done. Perhaps that’s what’s missing in today’s society—a sense of pride in the completion of one’s work.
I’m not a person who’s prone to jealousy, envy or one who is easily offended.Where some are put off by the differences amongst others, I find them intriguing.I like how not everyone gets along.How some are more inclined to “click” with others.I think this makes life more interesting.
If everyone got along, then we’d probably all be quite similar.Where’s the fun in that?I find it much more intriguing to mingle amongst many, maintaining an open mind, never knowing when my path might cross with someone whom I share many similarities.
I don’t actively seek out new friends.Rather, I like to happen upon them sort of by chance.It’s like the old saying that if you go looking for love, you’ll never find it.I feel the same holds true in all relationships.Why?Because if you’ve set your eyes on finding one specific thing, then you’re somewhat blinded to other possibilities that may be better suited to you.
This is another reason I don’t play the jealousy or envy game or allow myself to be easily offended.Really, I don’t see the point in any of those behaviors.To me, they cast a negative vibe on things and block potential opportunities that might otherwise come my way.I let a lot of things roll off my back, instead of getting caught up in their drama.By doing so, I find life’s easier to handle, I’m more at peace and I emit an energy that attracts rather than repels others.
Sometimes, I find myself resistant to learn. Not that I don’t appreciate gaining higher knowledge and adopting greater skills. I do. It’s just that at times, especially when faced with having to absorb new information and then translate that into demonstrating what I have learned…in front of others, an odd shyness comes out in me.
Normally, I’m super outgoing. But when faced with this dilemma, I tend to second-guess my abilities. As one who strives to always do my best, the possibility that my best might not measure up embarrasses me.
I find this odd, seeing as I’m not one who allows my actions to be guided by what others think. But then, I do thrive, knowing that I handle myself in a manner that garners the respect of others. So perhaps that’s what I’m most fearful of—losing the respect of others should I attempt something new and fail.
So how do I go about getting over this? Well, seeing as I’m one who thirsts for being pushed, I suppose a good approach would be to embrace whatever it is I’m faced with, setting aside all thoughts that I might not succeed.
According to my own standards, no one ever fails if they at least try. True, one may not rise to the level they had hoped for, but then, perhaps they set their hopes at unrealistic levels. Maybe a better approach would be to accept our human qualities, the fact that we may well fall short of our goals and try our hardest, unconcerned with if others like our attempt or not.
This was a recurring theme today. I had one of those incredibly busy days that had me visiting a family member in the hospital. From there, I allowed two hours to drive to a class I was teaching a mere hour away. Traffic, however, had other plans. Instead of arriving a half hour early, I pulled up four minutes after class began. But that was okay, for I had maintained my calm and texted ahead that I was doing my best to get to class.
When I arrived, unable to have the planned upon meeting with the director ahead of time, instead of being upset, he was beyond understanding, appreciative that I had sent word of my delay. In turn, he kept the students informed, and everyone remained calm instead of stressing out that I was running behind. After all…stuff happens that we can’t always predict or control. Today’s super heavy traffic was a prime example.
After teaching class, I was scheduled to have a meeting half an hour out of my way. But the individual I was to meet with, aware of my horrific schedule and the fact that I was already slated to drive over 250 miles today, offered to come closer to me, only minutes away, to ease my time spent on the road.
Gotta love it when stuff like that happens!
At that dining meeting, we brought up how many of the people we know, ourselves included, live with serious physical ailments, that to many might prove disabling, but with us, most wouldn’t have a clue, looking at us as we walk down the street, that anything was wrong. We discussed the possible reasons behind this and came to the following conclusion.
Of our friends who have serious physical ailments, each remains extremely active rather than sedentary. In addition, and possibly more importantly, we each have adopted a positive attitude—a can-do one, if you will. Instead of being quick to react to things in a negative manner when life throws us curveballs, we set our eye on connecting with those, head-on, instead of allowing them to defeat or detour us. By doing so, I believe we allow our positive attitudes to guide us into better physical, emotional and mental lives.
If, however, we were to take a defeatist attitude and let life get us down, no only would we walk around like we bore the heaviest weight on our shoulders, but we’d miss valuable opportunities to make other’s lives a little easier, such as the director did with me this afternoon, regarding the class I was to teach.
The director could have been a real pain. Shown no regard for the fact that I had tried my best, allowing ample time, to arrive on time. But instead, he opted to allow for the fact that, despite our grandest efforts, sometimes…life…just…happens. By doing so, his measured calm demeanor carried over to not only the students but to me the minute I walked in the door and saw his relaxed body posturing that was welcoming versus confrontational.
People have choices. They can opt to view the world through a positive lens, actively seeking out the good in life. Or they can narrow their eyes, adopt a stand-offish body pose and drive others away as well as stress themselves out by focusing on only the curveballs life tosses them.
Everyone receives curveballs in their lives. The trick is to keep your eye firmly on the ball and visualize yourself connecting with it solidly, rather than it grazing off your bat, or worse yet, missing it all together. With a positive can-do attitude, most things become possible.
Today, I though I’d do something a little different with my blog. A dear friend of mine sent me this link. Don’t usually pass these along, but this one is well worth the time spent watching it. I defy anyone to be able to sit through the whole video and not say, “Awww,” at least once.
I love it when folks come together. When circumstances cause their paths to intertwine, making it near impossible for them to avoid one another. Even if those individuals have had difficulties in the past, these opportunities provide a chance to amend, heal old hurts and move forward.
Of course, I’m a realistic person. As much as I’d like everyone to get along, sitting round campfires and signing Kumbaya songs, I’m keenly aware that individuals successfully interacting with one another can only be achieved if all parties are willing to work towards a common goal. Overlook their personal agendas to realize a bigger aim.
Sometimes this is possible…other times…not. Many factors play into whether or not individuals will be able to come together. Timing, personal baggage, emotional state of mind and stubbornness are only some of the elements that factor into if a relationship will blossom or wither. But, in my opinion, the biggest component that determines if a relationship stands a chance or not is the willingness by all parties to at least try to resurrect what once was when their paths cross.
Whether I’m standing on the sidelines, watching this play out with others or an active participant myself, I get a rush, thinking of all the possibilities. How a chance or even planned encounter can alter the face of once failed relationship, breathing new life into it. Perhaps it will flourish. Maybe not. Either way, as long as folks are willing to try, then nothing has been lost.
A friend of mine recently said, “It helps to know how much people care about and believe in you.” I couldn’t agree more!
To me, supportive comments are the loving hands that shore us up from behind, offering the strength we need to progress. Without them, we may be able to carry forth, but the effort required is monumental. But with encouragement from those around us, our burdens seem less cumbersome.
Added to this, I’m a firm believer that folks need to be made aware when they have positively impacted the lives of another. So often, we go through our daily grind unaware that some small thing we did, said or shared had a positive impact on another.
Why is it that many folks are quick point out faults but when faced with something good another has done to/for them, they remain silent, as if it’s some big secret? I’ve never been a fan of this mentality. Instead, I make it a point to let folks know whenever they’ve done something that’s had a positive influence on me. After all, I not only want to reward their effort by acknowledging their deed, but I believe that the best way to respect someone is to honor their actions. And what better way than to give thanks where thanks are due?
I appreciate and consume every supportive word said to me. They serve as my emotional nutrients. Likewise, I imagine folks like to hear similar accolades. Whenever I’ve issued praise to someone, they’ve been grateful. Some have been a little surprised, not used to having positive feedback. But all are appreciative.
We’re human. A characteristic of being such is that we thrive off of recognition, acceptance, affection and positive feedback. So, in the words of my friend, “It helps to know how much people care about and believe in you.”
Living in southern California, I’ve learned o tolerate traffic fairly well. But…one of my pet peeves is when someone decides to zoom around me and then pull in front of me, slowing down in the process, so that I then have to apply my brakes. Unfortunately, this happens on a fairly regular basis. I try to not let it get to me, but there are times I lose that battle.
Being a runner who competes in large races of 28,000-126,000 participants each, I’ve learned how to cope with large numbers of individuals around me as I’m pushing my body hard to achieve my personal goals. There are certain unspoken rules of courtesy when running. One is, slower runners stay to the right while faster ones pass on the left, announcing they’re doing so in the process. Another, one would never dream of passing someone only to cut in front of them and then go slower like the annoying vehicles I encounter on the freeways.
On my mountain run today, I came across quite possibly one of the most annoying individuals I’ve encountered while hiking or running. He was walking with his girlfriend and talking at such a volume that despite my having my headphones on and music playing, I could hear his every word as he tried to “impress” her with how he’d basically fried enough of his brain cells while drinking in the past as to have finally “cooked” the one responsible for making him want to drink.
Oh, brother, does he think this impresses the poor woman?
The woman gave a nervous giggle. Wasn’t much else she could do.
I hurried past them, wanting to create distance between them so I wouldn’t have to listen to more of the man puffing out his chest and “impressing” his intended. Though I’d opted to walk the trail today while fighting off the remnants of a head cold, I was still able to pass the couple with ease. A good eight of a mile spanned between us, me finally unable to hear the man’s obnoxious tales as he tried to sound impressive to the woman.
But then, I became aware that the man’s voice was getting closer…and closer…until…he and the woman were right beside me.
Oh, goody, annoying company!
Then, the man and woman did the unthinkable, they cut right in front of me, stopped jogging and made me almost crash into the back of them, me moving at a faster pace.
Really? Really now?!
I brushed of their rudeness and passed to their left, continuing to walk my pace. Creating instant distance between us, I thought I was in the clear as I heard the man’s voice fade away. But I was wrong…oh, so wrong. When about another eight of a mile had gaped between us, I again heard the man’s voice growing closer.
Great…just great!
Once again, the man and his girlfriend did the same maneuver, passing me then stepping in front of me as they stopped jogging, causing me to almost collide with them.
What the…? Are they looking to be rear-ended by a hiker?
Annoyed but managing to mask that fact, I passed the couple to their left and continued walking. Again, I forced blissful distance between us. But…when I heard the man’s voice growing closer for the third time, I decided enough was enough and began running, knowing the couple would never be able to keep up with me since I cranked up my speed to six-minute miles.
My body, still trying to recover from the last bits of my head cold, wasn’t too thrilled with being pushed so hard, but I cared not, figuring that I was either going to outrun the annoying man or go off on him for his blatant and repeated rudeness.
I finished the final mile and a half of my run without ever seeing or, thankfully, hearing the man or his girlfriend again.
Yay!
I must admit, this is the first time I’ve ever encountered that kind of individual while running or hiking. It makes me wonder. If he’s that obnoxious while running, I shudder to think how he drives.
This has already been an exceptionally snake-ridden year up on the mountain I run. I’ve been traversing this mountain trail for over twelve years now and never before have I come across this many snakes. How many do I see? Well, I run the mountain daily and see at least one per run. In past years, I might have come across five total during snake season.
I’m not sure what’s drawn so many snakes to my trail. Or if they’ve always been there and are just making their presence more known. Whatever the reason, I’m keeping my eyes peeled.
I come across garter, ribbon and rattle snakes daily. None of those bother me, especially the southern pacific rattlers, if I am respectful of them. Many people believe that rattlesnakes are intent on biting people whenever they can. That’s not usually the case. Rattlesnakes are fairly docile unless they feel an immediate threat.
About a week ago, I came across another snake, one I’d never encountered on my mountain trail. It looked suspiciously like the southern pacific rattlers I’m used to encountering but had more vibrant colors, same diamond patterning along its back, and was a pissy little fella, easily agitated with a rattle that was pointy, like the tip of a tail, instead of rounded at the end. Didn’t seem to mater that I was giving it plenty of space as I tried to go around it, no, this snake was irritated and wanting to strike.
Hmmm….
I managed to get around the snake, passing behind it, without getting struck, but made a mental note to familiarize myself with this newest species upon my return home. About a mile further along the trail, I happened upon another of the same kind of snake, only this one and I were attempting to occupy the same spot on the ground at the exact same moment! Thankfully, I’m agile enough to recoil when needed, and that I did, just as the snake lunged out.
Looking over my shoulder as I kept going, I made a greater mental note to discover what kind of snake was now on my mountain. Later that night, I had the occasion to chat with a friend. In the course of our conversation, I mentioned the snakes I’d encountered earlier on my run. I described how they both seemed to be of the same species and pissy disposition.
My friend told me it sounded like I’d encountered Western Diamondback snakes. He shared that, yes, they are more aggressive than the southern pacific rattlers.
Oh, goody!
He also told me they’re more venomous.
Double joy!
And then he pointed out that Western Diamondbacks are responsible for more bites per year than my southern pacific species.
That does it! I’m keeping a super close eye out for them now!
Since my encounters, I haven’t seen any more Western Diamondbacks. Have come across more of the others. Surprisingly, I’m fine with those, as if I leave them alone, they keep to themselves, relaxing on the pathway as they sun themselves. But the Diamondbacks…yeah, those I’m…not such a fan of and hope to have limited encounters with.
I love how things have a way of going the way they’re meant to go. Of course, that’s only possible if we’re open to allowing them to do so, instead of attempting to force our will on a situation.
Yesterday, I had the occasion to get together with some folks. I thought that gathering would go one way. But once there, I was surprised to discover things playing out in a different direction than I’d thought they might.
Instead of getting rattled and attempting to get things back on the track I thought they should be, I took a step back and let things play out as they were intended. In doing so, I was able to relax and was pleasantly surprised by a number of opportunities that presented themselves to me, not the least of which were future business dealings.
By the time I parted, I had a content smile on my face, the same one I’d donned the majority of the gathering. I not only felt at peace and excited about the business opportunities that presented themselves, but also to the new connections I made while there.
Yup, it’s pretty darn cool how things go the way they’re meant to if we get out of their way.
An update on my blog from two days ago. My Spanish photographer friend who flew in from Spain for a photo shoot and was in a car accident the following day is still here in the US.
Yay!
Though he was bed-ridden and had to await a doctor to come and check him yesterday, he is feeling much better today. He’s been placed in a leg brace for his sprained knee but is cleared to get up and do things, as he is comfortable. To celebrate, a couple of photographer friends of mine and I will go out with our injured friend tonight.
I’m so grateful that the doctor has allowed my Spanish photographer friend to stay for a bit in the US. I was afraid that if he’d had to get on a long international plane flight with his sprained knee, unable to hold it in the necessary bent position to sit on a plane, he would have had a miserable flight home. I know. Have suffered with knee injuries and international flights myself. And frankly, they stink!
But now, with my friend being granted extra time to stay here in the US to visit, he is also buying time for his knee to heal a bit more and for the swelling to go down. He’ll be here for another week before heading back to Spain to have it checked there by his own doctor. In the meantime, we’ll keep him company and show him Southern Californian sites.
Our oldest son is here visiting from up north. It’s been wonderful to see him and his younger brother so close. That wasn’t always the case while they were growing up. But now…
Yesterday was our youngest son’s last day of school. When I went to pick him up, his older brother was with me as a surprise. The moment our youngest son spotted his brother, he literally squealed with delight and rushed to give him a tight hug, having super missed him.
Unfortunately, both our girls and granddaughter are out of state right now, so are missing the chance to visit. But no worries, they’ll reconnect before too long. In the meantime, it’s been great hanging out with both our boys. Tonight, we got to go to a quick bite for dinner and then go to see X-men together as a family.
I must admit, I felt a bit outnumbered, being surrounded by only the men in our family. But that didn’t stop me from having a great time. Usually I head to the movies with my girls to, you know, see chick flicks. So going to see X-men wasn’t exactly my cup of tea. But…being able to spend the entire night with the guys in my family was. These are the times that make my soul smile.
A photographer friend of mine flew in from Spain on Wednesday to do a photo shoot. He was able to do the job that night. After, he planned to spend a week here, sightseeing. But then on Thursday, he was in a car accident.
Ugh!
As a result, he spent time in the hospital. He was diagnosed with a sprained knee and is now on crutches. Knee injuries are the worst! The pain is so bad, that my friend is seriously considering flying home tomorrow—Friday. What a shame to have flown all this way, been able to get his work done and be looking forward to some fun only to have fate step in. It would be so sad if my friend has to fly home early.
After the photo shoot Wednesday night, another friend and I offered suggestions of places for our photographer friend to visit while in California. Appreciative of our suggestions, he was really looking forward to a nice line up of places to see while here.
Hmmm….
But it would appear that fate has other plans for my friend…. I’m hoping things will turn around for him over night. That the pain will subside enough for him to be able to stay as planned. Also…that would give the sprain some time to heal so it won’t be quite so uncomfortable on the long flight when he does return home.
I believe this quote to my very core! I always say that it’s life’s challenges, in between the good times, that make us better appreciate the easier times. These trials force us to focus on what’s really important. In doing so, we manage to overcome seemingly insurmountable odds. In the process, we become stronger.
Hardships and challenges are what keep life interesting. Without them, we’d go round and round as the status quo, never having a true measure by which to gauge how good or bad things are. Of course, no one likes challenges that stretch the limits of our capabilities. But I believe they are intrinsic to our personal growth and enable us to become strong enough to surmount even the greatest challenges.
To me, there are few things better than being given the chance to try new things. Engage in unique experiences that open the doors to new perceptions, understanding and opportunities. I speak to folks all the time about this and am surprised by how many are resistant to the idea of trying new things.
Ever since I can recall, I was adventuresome. Not only did I want to try new things, but also there was an inner yearning, innate to my being, that needed to branch out. Being a person who follows the promptings that stem from within, I’m most often pleasantly surprised by the discoveries I adopt when trying new things.
Of course, some of those don’t seem pleasant at the time, but…by the time all is said and done, I’m grateful for having followed what I was led to do. This is how I grow, learn and better comprehend the world around me. Without a willing spirit to guide me outside my comfort zone, I believe I’d feel stagnant, like I was being jipped and not making the most of what time I’ve been given.
I’m a firm believer that life is short, we have been granted the biggest gift of being here and we are to honor that by maximizing our experiences while here. To do any less seems, to me, like the biggest insult to our existence.
I’ve always thought that returning home after a trip is a good thing. Some of those occasions I’m just happy to be home, while others I smile broadly and am thrilled to be back home.
On my flight from Atlanta today, our pilot gracefully touched down so gently on the tarmac as to make me wonder if the wheels had made contact yet. The moment I heard the reversing of the engines and heard that unmistakable high-pitched whirr of the engines, however, I knew we had, and my face broke into the biggest smile.
It’s not like I’d been gone for an extended time—only a few days. Yet something about returning home this time was doubly special. Over dinner last night, I shared with a couple of friends that I’d already begun to think about returning home. Not that I wasn’t enjoying my trip. I was. It’s just that I felt blessed and excited by all that awaited me at home.
I picked up a new class, have been researching new locales and made contact with a ton of great individuals, some of whom are becoming fast friends.
Yeah, coming home is always good. But when one has new adventures awaiting her upon her arrival, the anticipation level skyrockets.
I appreciate how relationships are strengthened by the individuals involved maintaining their separateness. This allows each person to go out and have experiences, grow from them and then bring that newfound knowledge back to the relationship, which strengthens it.
I hold true to this philosophy in all my relationships. For example, I don’t get jealous when my husband or friends go off and “do their own thing.” Nor do I get upset by their taking time for themselves. In fact, I encourage it.
I’ve given a lot of thought to this lately as others, who are inclined to be jealous, come to my attention. Fueled by their jealousy, they do or say or act in a manner meant to chaos. I suppose they’re hoping to disrupt the lives of others, since they don’t seem to have control of their own.
Instead of getting upset, I feel sad for those people. Down deep, I don’t believe they want to cause turmoil—not really. Instead, I suspect their doing so is a reaction to their insecurity, amplifying it further for the world to see.
I wish there was a way to get through to these individuals. Help them understand that if they applied half the effort they do while being drama train conductors to that of understanding, then their relationships would blossom towards a fuller potential instead of being poisoned by jealously.
So what do I do when faced with someone who’s jealous, acting out and attempting to cause chaos in my life? I address the situation by shutting down the efforts of that person. That could mean that I go straight to the source. Other times, when I suspect that would only add fuel to the fire, I circumvent the individual, cutting off all avenues they might have to cause drama. My belief here is that it’s easier to prevent a fire than to try to extinguish it once oxygen has fed it.
The old saying is true: we can’t change someone who doesn’t want to be changed. But that doesn’t mean we have to be subject to their bad behavior. And in my book, jealousy and all it encompasses/causes, is amongst the worst behavior.
I’m on the east coast and got to walk the beach with a dear friend today. Together, we sought shells that I could bring home to share with my granddaughter. Along our walk, we came across a construction area on the beach, where they’re digging huge pits that were filled with water. We navigated our way around the perimeter of each, wondering what they were for while marveling over the great assortment of shells that, long buried, had been unearthed during the construction.
Walking the edges of the pits was odd. One minute, I’d be atop the sand…the next, one of my feet would sink and my leg would then be buried up to above the knee, as if I’d stepped in a huge snowdrift. One of these times, I sunk so deep, first one leg and then the other, that the only way I got out was to have my friend pull me. Laughing, we marveled over how the pits really should have been fenced or at least taped off, seeing as how a person, if alone, could easily get stuck.
The oddest part was that when I sunk into the sand at the edge of the pits, what my feet came in contact with was honest to goodness clay. You know… the stuff we used to make things out of when at school. And let me tell you, that stuff acts like quicksand, sucking you right down into it! It grabbed hold and wouldn’t let me go, thus my friend having to pull me out.
Together, my friend and I managed to circumvent those pits without getting overly stuck. By the time we were done, we had a lovely collection of shells that I hope my granddaughter will appreciate.
I love how folks seem to appreciate the thoughts that rattle around in my head. The stories I share. My philosophies. As a writer, I’m compelled to spill onto paper what’s in my mind. And frankly, there’s a plethora of disjointed thoughts bumbling their way around in there all the time.
But it’s hard to know if what I regurgitate onto paper is something folks will be interested in before I jot it down. So, when I get feedback from readers that they enjoy what I share, that makes my day!
One method of honing my writing skills is to write at least three handwritten pages in a journal every day. I do so without fail, following a pattern of writing referred to as stream-of-consciousness. That means I don’t jot down how my day went…well...not in any organized fashion. And there are times, my journal entry may be very little about my day, instead, more focusing on random thoughts, perceptions or feelings I’m experiencing. Still other times, my journal entries reflect plot concepts for writing projects I’m working on.
When I began bogging, I opted to do so in this stream-of-consciousness method, allowing folks to see behind-the-scenes of a writer’s creative process and how my thoughts formulate. Words fail me to express just how gratifying it is that my readers are interested in what I have to share, even though that is often random and disconnected.
A writer’s greatest satisfaction comes from being able to connect with others. To have their written words impact those who digest them. From the bottom of my heart, I thank everyone for continuing to read my blogs and for those who opt to add comments.
Yesterday, I blogged about folks who wear perpetual frowns versus those who seem to always have a smile hidden just off stage. Today, I flew from California to Florida, and let me tell you, I cam across plenty of odd folks. There were those who were utterly clueless about flying—the etiquette, how to go through the security points, how to check in, etc. Then there were those who were beyond grouchy to the point of downright bitchy.
One of those was a woman who sat beside my husband and me on our connecting flight. From the second she approached our seat and spied the woman in front of her placing a bag in the overhead bin, the woman went on the offensive, barking at the flight attendant that she was certain that other woman’s bag wouldn’t fit, and that she wanted her briefcase to go there instead. The flight attendant was polite when she demonstrated the bag did fit. But our seat companion wasn’t done complaining, dripping out her negative venom for another full minute.
Sheesh!
Later, when I got up to use the restroom, I handed my husband my Starbuck’s iced coffee, complete with a lid, to hold. He carefully placed it on the seat between the woman and himself. The woman, huffed the second his hand came away from it, slammed down my laptop tray and angrily put my coffee atop it, stating, “There, that’s were it won’t spill!”
Well, alrighty then!
On the first leg of our journey, we had a lengthy flight, made excruciatingly long by a couple with one-year-old twins who hadn’t a clue how to contain, much less appease their children. As a result, both children screamed and screeched for the full five laborious hours we spent together.
Oh, boy!
By the time my husband and I got off our final flight, arriving in Florida, we hoped that the driver who was to meet us would be civil and nice. Thankfully, he was. We loaded in his car and as the miles slipped away, delivering us closer to our destination, so, too, did the unpleasantness that had engulfed us for twelve long hours.
Despite all the odd individuals we encountered, I didn’t let them dampen my spirit or dull the enthusiasm I had for being able to travel with my husband for a get away. I only hope that the grouchiness those individuals displayed dissipated at some point, allowing them to better appreciate their day.
Ever notice how some people seem to have a permanent scowl on their face? How they look as if they’ve been frowning their entire life? I find myself studying those individuals. I watch the way they interact with others, trying to catch a glimpse of them smiling…if only for a brief moment or two. And yet, I never do, see them smiling that is. These individuals come across as sad to me.
Then there are those whose faces seem to be caught in a forever half smile. Their eyes twinkle with the promise of a grin about to break forth. The edges of their eyes crease ever so slightly, foretelling of all the happy times they’ve had. The corners of their mouths are slightly uplifted as if they’re trying to repress a smile but not quite succeeding. I study these individuals with the greatest interest, delighting at how they break into laughter or their faces light into brilliant smiles with the greatest of ease. I can’t help but delight in how happy these individuals seem.
Ever since I was a little girl, I’ve been fascinated with whether a person’s face depicted a permanent frown or hint of a smile about to break forth. My heart aches for those who don forever frowns, for I wonder how many thousands of hours of frowning and deep sorrow caused that expression on their faces. Likewise, my heart sings for those whose faces glow with promised smiles.
Although I’ve had my share of deep sorrows and trials in my life, I hope my face depicts the smile that’s most often in my heart—the one that just has to break out.
