Wednesday, November 30, 2011

As a parent, there are certain things I’ve come to realize I have no affect on.  That are outside my control.  That I wish I could spare my children.  One doesn’t raise four kids without discovering this along the way.

When dawning realization set in that, no, I couldn’t spare my children from all of life’s woes, I had two choices, struggle against that reality or come to peace with it.  I chose the later.  Course this doesn’t mean that my heart doesn’t ache for my kids when something hurts them or when they’re ailing.  It does. 

But I realized that to get upset and fight against whatever is happening doesn’t help my children.  Instead, it detracts from my energy reserves and adds to whatever stress they’re enduring.

It took me a long time, but I finally learned to take a cleansing breath when faced with these situations and relax, allowing whatever is going to happen to play out.  By doing so, I’m better prepared to help my kids face whatever is needed and have the calm mindset needed to make it through.

This doesn’t mean that I don’t worry.  I do.  Or that I don’t get sad and frustrated sometimes.  I do.  But by adopting a more pragmatic mindset in these stressful situations, I’m able to compartmentalize my own feelings and do what’s needed to be the most helpful.  After all…isn’t that our primary job as parents—to be helpful?  To assist our children in their developmental journey? 

We may not be able to spare our kids from life’s woes, but how we opt to handle ourselves when faced with those situations goes a long ways towards either assisting or hindering our children. 

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

I’ve blogged before about how, while growing up, my father instilled in me an appreciation of seeking out wonderful finds in antique and second-hand stores.  He also instilled a deep sense of making one’s money go as far as possible.  My translation: I work darn hard for my money, therefore, I should work equally hard at spending it in the wisest way possible. 

For some, their pulse quickens when they enter a chain store and see the latest and greatest on display.  Those have never held any allure for me.  Instead, I seem to have a built-in homing device that directs me straight to the clearance racks in those stores.  Better yet, my intuitiveness sends me to outlets and little hole-in-the-wall locales where one might have to spend more time searching, but the treasures that can be gained are well worth the search.  Not only that, but the bargains that can be had top all else. 

Yes, I admit that I’m a through-and-through bargain shopper. Have been my entire life.  Another trait I inherited from my father.  One I’m most appreciative of.  To me, it simply makes no sense to buy some run-of-the-mill item that everyone else is able to find.  Guess I’m too much of an individual for such.  Also, that it’s marked at top dollar holds little appeal for me.  After all, why pay more when doing so is unnecessary?

My joy comes in discovering unique items that have their own flair, which I can translate into my own or give as special gifts.  There’s nothing more gratifying than seeing the look on the receiver’s face when they open something I’ve given them and wonder where in the heck I ever found something so charming and unique.

I’m aware that some might be wrinkling their noses in distaste for this manner of shopping.  And that’s fine.  To each their own….  But for me, I’ll keep combing through the less traveled locales to fine buried treasures that I’ll end up paying far less for.  

Monday, November 28, 2011

There are days, such as today, when I get up and hit the ground running, never having a moment’s rest.  I know many of you can relate.  Seems to be more the norm in today’s hectic society than not.  Days like today make me appreciate the slower ones where I don’t have to think hard a mere halfway through as to what I did at the beginning of the day.

But as with most things, I tend to seek the positive in any given situation.  Today was no exception.  So, although my day had me driving here, there and everywhere for a total of seven hours, I looked for the silver lining.  Didn’t have to gaze far, as it was a gorgeous day—one perfect for driving and appreciating the passing scenery.

Crystal blue skies, dotted with fluffy white clouds stretched in every direction.  The outdoor temp was in the low eighties, and the slightest breeze kept things pleasant.  Had I not been actively seeking the positive, my long day of driving might have turned sour.  As it was, I had a lovely day, looking this way and that at passing scenery while trying to remember that I needed to focus on driving as well.       

Sunday, November 27, 2011

I apologize for the lack of my blog for the past two days.  On Friday, I spent the day and evening with out of state friends, intending to write and post my blog upon my return.   But fate had other plans.  I ended up with food poisoning from our dinner and spent the remainder of Friday and all of Saturday in bed.  Not a fun way to spend the holiday weekend.

Since I’d had a great idea for a blog and didn’t get to post it due to being ill, I’ll write about it now.  The concept came from a slip of paper I found in another fortune cookie.  I know.  I know.  I seem to get a lot of inspiration from those silly slips of paper.  But hey, if it inspires me, then I feel compelled to share.

The paper said: look for happiness and you will find it.  Seems like a simple enough concept.  It is.  But there are many who never catch it’s full meaning, therefore, missing out on many possibilities. 

For one to discover happiness, they must be open to it infusing their lives.  They can’t walk around with a doom cloud hovering over their heads, focusing on life’s negatives and hope to have happiness break through that impenetrable barrier.  Just won’t happen.  There has to be a willingness and openness to accept happiness for it to become a part of one’s life. 

This is where many miss out on opportunities.  They are simply too preoccupied with life’s little hiccups and more major setbacks to openly receive happiness.  Not that those same individuals don’t want happiness or that they wouldn’t be thrilled to experience it.  Many are.  But they’re too closed off. 

I agree with my fortune that happiness is dependant upon a person actively engaging in the process of seeking it.  To be open to finding it.  To want to accept happiness and positive energy into their lives to counteract the effects of the rest of life’s challenges.  To offset them.  Mitigate their affect on us.  Happiness helps put things into perspective, making one aware that life is not all doom and gloom.  That if we openly desire to seek happiness, then it will grace our lives.

Thursday, November 24, 2011

There’s something magical about watching animals interact with one another.  How they manage, if left to their own devices, to mitigate problems that arise with swiftness that doesn’t harbor guilt, hard feelings or negativity.  Humans could learn a lot from animals if they only took the time to pay close attention.

These thoughts are tumbling around in my head as I’ve enjoyed watching my mother and son dogs interact with one another over the past week.  Though they have never lived farther apart that a fence separating them, being this up-close-and-personal requires certain adjustments be made.

It’s been gratifying to watch how Sadie, the mother dog, will take and take and take from her son, Foster, but then, once she’s had enough, a simple growl or snap at the air is enough to put him back in line and make him know he’s crossed the line.  He doesn’t react with anger or pout.  Instead, he graciously accepts that it’s time to stop bothering his mother and lays down beside her in harmony.  Again, humans could learn a lot from this example.

I have always allowed my dogs to work things out amongst themselves, and for the most part, that’s been for the best.  As such, my dogs drink from the same water dish, can eat food beside one another without fighting and freely share toys with one another.  Should one have a particular toy they really want to play with and not give up, again, a simple growl lets the other know that—for now—that toy belongs to them.  That when they’re done, it will be available to be shared.  Again, there are no hard feelings with this mentality. 

I spend a lot of time watching my animals.  Always have.  It pleases me to see how they work things out and in the process, I learn important life skills that I can then apply to my own interactions with others.