Monday, October 18, 2010

Getting through things. People go about this in a variety of manners. A couple of days ago, I blogged about how I had taken myself off my post-surgery pain meds—cold turkey—my method of getting through my recovery. Others may have finished the remainder of the prescription. Some may have needed more. Is one technique better than the other? No, just different.

Stress and pain, these are the key things people find themselves having to face. And each has a different technique for how they deal. Some may adopt carefully thought out plans. While others end up implementing spur-of-the-moment decisions that materialize when pushed to their limits.

Take for example the first-time mother who faithfully attends natural childbirth classes and swears she’ll endure the birthing experience natural, using no drugs of any kind. For nine long months, she remains dedicated to her plan. She goes into labor. Feels the first “real” labor pains kick in, and then her carefully thought out plan goes straight out the window when she grabs her husband by his shirt and growls, “Get my doctor! I neeeeeeeeed something for the pain!”

Was it wrong that she abandoned her plan? No! Did it diminish her initial resolve? No. Was her decision guided by an instinctual survival mode that kicked into high gear when her pain threshold was pushed to its max? Oh, yeah! And that’s okay.

Each person has his or her own method of dealing with pain. Some scream. Others rant. Some act like a hurt dog that crawls under the porch to be alone. And the manners in which people deal with stress are equally diverse. Some throw a fit. Others get angry. There are those who fall apart. Can’t sleep. Are incapable of doing their jobs. And then there are those who, when faced with pain or stress, appear, at least outwardly, like nothing is wrong, when on the inside, a massive implosion is taking place.

Coping techniques can drive folks to do things they normally wouldn’t when faced with situations that maximize their dealing capabilities. There are those who are quick to pass judgment, pointing an accusatory finger at individuals who lean towards methods of coping that they themselves find offensive or unacceptable. Me? I choose not to play that game, for I try to be empathetic with others. And if I can’t empathize with their plight, I remember my own humanness and foibles. How there are things that push me to my limits. Threaten to break me. By doing so, I’m able to show compassion to that person and understand that they may be executing coping techniques they might otherwise not.