Lately, I seem to be having the same conversations with a wide variety of folks. This time, it’s about moving past a situation that has stressed a relationship. We’ve all been here at some point or another. Whether it’s with our spouse, a friend, work colleague, etc, there comes a time when lines are crossed, feelings are hurt and animosity begins to fester. The question is not so much how to avoid it, for some level of this in inevitable, but how do the parties involved move forward once those lines have been crossed, feelings are hurt and animosity begins to foster?
There are those who simply walk away—forever, never once looking back. For some, that’s and easy task with no regrets or second thoughts. Others end up plagued with an inundation of mixed emotions, all stemming from wondering if they’ve done the right thing. But pride often gets in the way of them stepping up to correct the situation.
Others will go a different route, taking a break, effectively putting themselves in “time out” until they have the opportunity to process through all that has happened. How it has affected them. What they should do next. And only once the situation has been completely dissected by them, does that person attempt to reach out to rectify things.
Still other will have an emotional explosion that erupts without notice, spewing its molten ill will and bad vibes on any and everyone that it comes in contact with. This only worsens the already unstable situation, effectively adding fuel to the fire.
Which approach do I favor? I’m a fan of the self-issued time out approach. For with that method, I believe that each party has as chance to constructively process through all that has happened without lashing out at one another. And then, once they have collected their thoughts and reined in their emotions, they can sit down like rational adults and discuss things in an attempt to rectify the situation. In my opinion, this is how folks can most effectively move past a situation that has put a strain on the relationship.
But what say you? How do you move beyond a situation that has strained a relationship?
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